Just the other day, I was at the Drybar having a blowout and while at the shampoo bowl, I overheard the woman next to me telling her stylist how she had recently quit her job as an Accountant and enrolled in Esthetic School. I thought this was incredibly interesting as I mentally took note and filed it along with all the other similar stories I have heard and read recently. I am beginning to see a pattern develop. I have spoken with and seen many individuals, women to be exact begin to rebel. Let’s see….this isn’t the first time we have seen something like this….. Let’s take a trip back in history to a “little” time we refer to as Women’s Suffrage. The right for women to vote. This was just one facet of the many issues women fought for throughout history. To name a few….the right to hold a job, the right to education, property rights, and not to get too political, but the right to make decisions over her own body.
So what is happening now? We fought so hard to be paid equally, to be able to own our own things and actually have property in our name, to have a proper education and to choose when we want to bear children and now more and more women are choosing to be stay at home mothers; or forego their formal education as they choose a career path viewed as something “lesser.” Is nature catching up with us? Are we realizing that maybe we signed ourselves up for too much? Did we finally prove “Yes! We can do it all” and now we are over it?
I don’t know what is prompting the female species to suddenly exhibit a shift in behavior, but I can give you some insight from my own life. I went to college and received a degree in Accounting and as I got closer and closer to graduation panic ensued. I had no idea what I wanted to do. Everyone was going to one of the Big Fours and I had a long-term boyfriend that I knew I would marry and I was not willing to sacrifice time with him to spend 70+ hours a week with people, that I didn’t care to spend time with at all. I knew that I did not want to pick my career over my family, however it made my future building a little difficult during my senior year of college. Fast forward a couple of years and we were married and I will never forget the day we got back from our honeymoon I had this overwhelming feeling of not being interested in my job or a career AT ALL. It was as if someone had flipped a switch. The following years were a little rough, I won’t go into detail as I have in my chapter, you can read in the Every Heart Project Collaborative Book, Every Heart Has a Story.
But I was left asking myself, why can’t I have a job as a homemaker? Why is it so bad that I want to make it my job to support my husband in the home so he is able to go out into the world in the best possible condition in order to better support our family? Why am I only valued monetarily? Why are my skills as a wife and homemaker not valued? I love keeping a clean house, I love being able to cook my husband a nice meal. There are many women that are able to function while holding down a prominent position in the corporate world and do everything they need to do at home. Well guess what y’all…. I am not one of them! I want to invest 100% effort into what I love, and that is my home and family. Unfortunately, I am not able to do that while also holding down a job. I am not able to drive every day to an office, spend all of my day there and then come home and tackle the huge to do list that is waiting for me. I admire anyone who is, but I was simply not built that way. When the bed is not made, it eats me alive, the piles of laundry covering our bedroom floor create a hole in my heart. Knowing all the toilets in our house need to be scrubbed will practically give me a full on melt down. What if I want to spend half my day making myself attractive to my husband? What if I find satisfaction and pride in my husband having a perfectly folded and organized underwear drawer? (I almost took a picture of this to show you, but then decided against it…..you will just have to believe me, it is perfectly folded….). Hasn’t the divorce rate been its lowest recently? Could this female rebellion be contributing to this? Why was the divorce rate so high in the past? Was it because women collapsed under the pressure of keeping a house, trying to climb the corporate ladder, give their husbands attention and take care of kids too? Did we finally come to our senses and realize we need to stop spreading ourselves so thin? Wasn’t the point of fighting for Women’s Rights to give us options? What if I want the option to not work, and stay home and be a homemaker, or stay at home Mom? Shouldn’t I have the option to do that and not be deprived of my dreams? Isn’t not having the option to fulfill my dream, the same as a woman who has a dream to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 Company or better?
I want to hear your thoughts and opinions on this trend that is developing of women who are seeking jobs that give them more flexibility or women who are becoming full-time homemakers all together. Are we taking for granted all of the work the women before us have done? Or are we growing and developing and evolving while utilizing the progress we have made in the past? I am by no means an expert on Women’s Rights or any topic that relates. I am simply a woman living in this world with a society heavily influenced by the women that have come before me, and it has left me with some questions.
Have we devalued our own worth in the household?
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